Post by mystifyingoracle on Oct 30, 2020 23:50:49 GMT -5
OOC: Thank you to the fabulous DistortedAmber for this collab!
Saltwatercolor
It was like being invited into a waking dream.
Silvio marveled at the sight of the art installation hanging overhead that led visitors to the National Aquarium’s, ‘Jellies Invasion,’ exhibit. Pastel-colored jellyfish forms were suspended above his head; an iridescent path of pale pinks, aquas, and purples leading into the darkened entrance. It reminded him of Seattle; Chihuly’s seaforms at Glass and Garden.
A taste of home all the way across the country.
But he wasn’t just there for his own pleasure. This was more of a business trip, as it were. Honestly, though, it was getting harder and harder to meaningfully separate his personal and professional lives.
Strolling into the exhibit, he grinned at the layout. The design was something straight out of a sci-fi movie; the interior of the Enterprise if it had been designed by some day dreaming marine biologists. The illuminated aquariums cast undulating blue light about him, bathing everything in their calm. Closing his eyes briefly, he just let the low, steady pulse of the water and the constant hum of the filtration systems seep into him. Exhaling, his heartbeat slowed to the rhythm. Among many other things, he liked that aquariums had a way of smoothing out the jagged edges of his thoughts. Everything calmed and the hectic momentum of everyday life eased.
If there was a place in Baltimore that might temper the tempest that was the Painted Hurricane, he figured this was it.
Outside of the ring, he’d had only a brief encounter with her. Just once in the gym when he’d been speaking with Mitch and Jenova prior to her exiting the company. He still wondered how the Calamity from the Sky was faring these days. Amber had been world champ at that time, but even so, he’d been struck by the timidity of her engagement; the uncertain vulnerability she exuded just approaching a group of her co-workers. It seemed incongruous to the persona she took on in the ring, but Silvio knew every coin had two sides, and Angry was just Sad’s bodyguard.
Maybe that’s why he’d asked to meet her here.
BOYSCOUT.
Yeah, he mused to himself with a little grin. Tell me something I don’t know.
"I haven't been to an aquarium since I was a young girl."
From behind where Silvio stood admiring the ocean expanse, the voice of a certain redhead rang out with a twinge of wistful nostalgia.
"I went a few times with my Aunt, I didn't understand till much later that she hated going with me…"
Silently Amber sidled up beside him, an almost knowing smile complimenting the glimmer of childhood joy in her eyes.
"Mostly for the fact I never wanted to leave."
Hurricanes and the ocean seemed like a perfect match, their turbulent nature's mirrored in water and sky. Granted she never much liked swimming, the wonders of the deep still entranced her in a way she couldn't explain.
Silvio, lost in his reverie, startled a little at Amber’s words. Once the moment passed, however, he turned and beamed at her.
“Hey! You made it!”
Smiling, he followed her gaze, watching the jellies drift in their graceful, lazy waltz.
“Yeah, I grew up in Seattle and going to the aquarium was always a lot of fun. I love how peaceful it can be, and it’s great for design inspiration.”
He nodded to the moon jellies, luminous ghosts in their cylindrical aquarium.
“Like the silver linings come undone from somebody’s saltwater dreams.”
Reaching into his hoodie pocket, he drew out a few hard candies, taking a strawberry bonbon for himself before offering the rest to Amber.
“Thanks for coming out. Obviously we got the match coming up, but I know it might’ve seemed weird considering how things are at Carnage right now.”
Graciously Amber accepted a hard candy, stashing it away in her own pocket almost automatically, an autopilot moment trying to adjust to the burst of optimism and enthusiasm. It was something that still caught her off guard at times- the way some could maintain their outwardly generous demeanor in the face of an industry determined to take everything from them that made them unique.
"Weird isn't the word I'd use, but I appreciate the invite. Feel like there are all the names and faces around and I don't feel like I recognize anyone anymore- especially the ones I'm supposed to know. Turbulent maybe. The ground is shifting under our feet and I don't like how my balance is holding up."
At a casual pace, one hand buried in the pocket of her jeans and the other tapping idly at her thigh, Amber strolled closer to the glass.
"You seem to be managing things just fine though, which is nice to see… Rather see guys like you doing well than pieces of shit like--"
As her mind was wont to do these days, Amber's thoughts drifted to the sheer disgust she felt knowing her actions had directly caused Ken Davison's ascension. Although for the moment she was thankful to have her back to Silvio if only so he didn't see the way she openly cringed nor the disdainful curl in her lip.
"-- like… well, I don't think I need to continue."
Placing a hand softly against the glass, Amber allowed the sigh she'd been holding to pass. Watching the graceful, effortless motion of the jellyfish dance as though they might be caught on a summers breeze.
Even cynicism could still know a sense of wonder.
“Thanks! I’ve been doing my best. It’s honestly been a pretty wild ride so far.” Following her gaze, he smiled, watching the peaceful orbits of the sea creatures. He imagined what it would feel like to be that weightless. Before he’d moved away from his father’s house, he’d sometimes go to the local rec center that had a pool and a high dive. There was a singular kind of freedom to scaling those cold, slippery steps, building up momentum and flinging yourself from a height that seemed dizzying at 10-years-old, before plunging into the deep water below. It felt like cheating gravity. He supposed it was a sister sensation to what he did in the ring; though those flights had decidedly harder landings.
“Thank you for defending my honor after our match at 97, by the way,” he said, fluttering his eyelashes and clasping his hands before him. “My hero.”
Amber had never realized how difficult it was to take someone seriously with fluttering eyelashes and an expression meant to be angelic, Amber stifled the chuckle trying to show gratitude but only succeeded in nearly choking on her laughter.
"Can't say I've ever been accused of heroism. Stupidity plenty, recklessness more… If you deserved the ass kicking I'd have thrown you to the wolves- but you didn't and neither did Fox.
“If the moment presented itself, I get the feeling that you'd do the same thing for me."
Stepping away from the glass, the glow from the water danced across her features and illuminated something behind her eyes.
"Not sure it's because it's just who you are or if it's cause I sense something… peculiar, perhaps."
“The Venn Diagram of heroism, stupidity and recklessness often looks remarkably like a circle,” Silvio replied with a grin. “If our roles had been reversed, I’d have done the same. And...I mean, even so, Ax is a complicated situation. Try not to judge him too harshly.” Shaking his head, he snorted. “Men, right? Anyone who thinks dating them is easier than women or any other gender should try it sometime.”
He took a moment to appreciate the play of the aqua light that shone upon Amber. It made a striking image with her pale skin and crimson hair; a fire bird from the ocean. At the mention of something about him being peculiar, he smiled and gestured to himself, the aquarium light glinting off of his own dark hair and tawny complexion.
“Definitely painted the temple walls more than your average Joe and have piercings in places I wouldn’t mention in polite company.”
While he knew that likely wasn’t what she was talking about, he’d take any scrap of normal he could. Another silvery laugh from the redhead echoed, this time though it's melodic quality held something else in it's teeth.
"Tattoos and piercings are the new normal. I'm no stranger to the kiss of the needle that's for sure, although admittedly far overdue for another.
“You're more than just the artwork you present or, dare I say, the cards you interpret… there's something under your skin, the sweet touch of Lady Death coursing through your veins---"
Amber paused abruptly, catching herself a little late.
"Sorry, I shouldn't have said that. Might be a little personal and all, I just get that sense off you…
“Not everyone gets that second chance, and few get to squander it as many times as I have."
Watching Silvio curiously, he didn't react outwardly and if he had it was lost to the ethereal glow that pulsated across his skin.
"Just… maybe forget I mentioned it. Seems silly now the more I think about it."
Turning to Amber, Silvio gave her a small smile.
“It’s okay,” he assured her. “You’re not wrong.”
His eyes flicked briefly ceiling-ward before settling back onto the graceful elliptical motions of the jellyfish.
“I was nineteen. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time doing something stupid and desperate. This group of people attacked me.”
Hands drifting to his chest and stomach, his eyes remained locked on the aquarium.
“You can’t really see the scars unless you know what to look for; as soon as I could, I made it a point to have them covered up with artwork. They still give me phantom pain every now and then. I pulled through, but...you don’t have something like that happen to you and come out the other side the same.”
Silvio shook his head with a sad smile, eyes distant.
“I was so scared. You hear about people that go through traumatic events like that talk about how they can’t remember what happened. Sometimes I think about how lucky those folks are. I mean, luck among the luckless, but you take every bit you can, y’know? The years haven’t faded the pictures or quieted the soundtrack. If I’m in a certain mood and my mind starts wandering, I can find myself back there.”
He traced a fingertip along the cold condensation gathered on the aquarium glass.
“I’m more than what those people did to me, and I’m not going to give them credit for the progress I’ve made or the good changes in my life that have come since. I don’t think people become strong because of the suffering they endure. That’s the kind of talk that lets abusers off the hook, minimizes the experiences of survivors, and helps foster an environment where folks think it’s acceptable to treat others like crap in the name of, ‘improving,’ them. I think people are strong in spite of their suffering.”
Looking back at her, he raised a brow with a lopsided grin.
“I don’t talk about it much. How about you? If you don’t mind me asking, of course; no pressure. Not gonna force anybody to relive their trauma.”
Amber shrugged with a small smile, one trying to hide the scratchy reel of memories flashing by.
"Don't think I ever really told anyone the story outside of the gory bits, the bits people think they need to know… the 'interesting bits' I suppose. Besides it's not like I've got anything to hide- was told once talking about it makes it better, sometimes it does"
Idly scratching her arm, Amber stared into clear abyss almost feeling the water against her skin like rain, the taste as though it were on her tongue and sound thundering in her ears.
"24. 'Professional' in the industry maybe 4 years by this point, I was driving between towns… you know the cliche, it's dark and raining and I'm travelling far faster than I should. Just looking to get to the next booking as though it's gonna pay me any better to get there sooner…"
8 years on the details never faded, like a movie playing a little too far away to make out the nuances of sound. It's just rain on metal, water on glass…
"I was travelling with my cousin Rebecca- she thought I was the fucking coolest… I wasn't but who was I to tell her different. Long story real short I guess, I lost control a few miles out of town, car starts going sideways, Rebecca is screaming next to me cause she didn't have her seatbelt on and it's jammed…"
It was slow motion now, even the sound in her head slowed as her expression softened into something pensive. Neither of them said anything for a few moments as the ambiance found a way to fill the space between them.
"Couldn't reach her belt with mine on… so I took mine off. Grabbed hers and held on as the car started to roll…Can't say I remember all that much until we stopped and then it's mostly just noise. There's glass everywhere and everything just feels… wet and cold."
A half smile crossed her face as though something about any of this was amusing, like the sheer gut wrenching tragedy of it held an unseen joke only known to those who have heard it.
"All the reports said I was dead when they got there… crawled halfway out the driver's side window, or what was left of it. Nearly 30 minutes apparently- should be brain damaged, hell maybe I am… I shouldn't have though. God I shouldn't have…"
Swallowing hard, Amber reined in everything trying to bubble to the surface. Adjusting the direction of the conversation before it slipped between her fingers.
"Rebecca's got out of it relatively unscathed from what I heard- never got to ask cause her side of the family pulled some legal shit to keep her name out of everything.
Haven't seen or heard from her since…"
A small chuckle escaped as she watched Silvio, as though unsure what to expect.
"... Things we do when we're young and stupid, hey?"
When she looked at him, his expression was gentle; brow relaxed and eyes limpid in the aquarium light.
“It’s awful that you had to endure that,” he replied softly. “But I’m glad you’re still here. I hope you’re able to reconnect with your cousin one day. Some people...they don’t really know how to cope with terrible things happening. That feeling of powerlessness in the face of something so huge and final is hard to deal with. Afterward, people can scramble for any bit of control they can find to try and feel better.”
Shrugging with a little grin, he snorted.
“Death can be a capricious thing, yeah? I figure now that I’ve met the fucker, they can show up with weed, beer, and doughnuts next time they pay me a visit.”
Amber forces a chuckle from inside her chest.
"Can I be honest? I'm not sorry at all.
“I mean as awful as things might have been, it's the reason I'm here… and quite possibly the same for you.
“Actions have consequence and reason, they might be terrible but they still mean something…"
There's something almost wistful about the redhead as she finds herself swept up in the atmosphere of the aquarium lights for a moment.
"Could I have been as successful - sure. Maybe even more so. However I also could have been a suburban mom dreaming of something better or a crack whore searching for the next hit of something in my veins.
“Death is a strange and curious mistress, but my god does she give a good kick in the ass"
“That she does.”
Quiet for a moment, Silvio shifted his weight from one foot to the other.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about the future lately. For me at Carnage, I mean. I’m sticking around, and I’ve been considering what that means. Makin’ a home for myself here.”
He shook his head, losing himself for a moment in the serenity of the aquarium.
“I didn’t know what success for me was going to look like doing this, exactly, but...now I’m starting to get ideas. Big ones.”
He looked baffled for a second.
“I never thought of myself as a competitive person, but...being here has brought out parts of myself I never knew were there; desires for things I had no idea I would have wanted”
Looking at her, he raised a brow.
“Was it the same for you?”
Amber returned the gesture with a knowing albeit relaxed smile, brushing some errant hair from her face.
"Hard to say really, I've always been competitive- that's more the product of my chosen path I suppose. I came into Carnage at a low point in my life. I didn't care about a lot of things for a long time, now… now I think I care too much."
There's something about the way everything seems to move in slow motion through water that mesmerizes, distracts even as Amber's train of thought derails slightly.
"Success is a matter of perspective. Some of us don't know what we want till it finds us, others only have eyes for one prize and will do anything to attain it. Sometimes success is just coming back when the world doesn't think you can- it just doesn't feel that way till you've gotten everything you ever wanted and realized it was never enough."
Nodding, he turned her words over in his head as if examining some precious bauble. Smiling, he looked to her again, a mischievous glint in his eye.
“Well. Sounds like you and I came back when the world tried to get rid of us. Guess that means we gotta take everything. Y’know - just to be sure.”