Chaos 109 Results

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Terra Skye: Hello Carnage Legion! Welcome to Chaos 109!!!

Johnny Vegas: What the fuck does any of it matter? Stop being so GOD DAMNED CHEERFUL!

Terra Skye: So you lied when you told me you were gonna be able to hold it together over the next three shows, huh?

And just as Terra completes her sentence…



“I Am The Slime” by Frank Zappa (22 seconds in) begins to play. “The Man With Two Brains” Johnny Hitmaker walks down the aisle to a very negative reaction.

Johnny Vegas: Ugh, God, THIS guy again…

Terra Skye: He’s been pretty vocal on social media ever since Incursion ended.

Johnny Vegas: I can’t believe such a crybaby manages a former World Champion!

He looks around at all the fans, only a small portion popping for the appearance of the Canadian legend. The remainder of the Carnage loyalists do not share the same sentiment. He heads further down the ramp, demanding the mic from Kelly Carmichael.

Johnny Vegas: Don’t give it to him!

Terra Skye: Honestly, I hope she does; Other Johnny doesn’t seem to be the type to take no for an answer.

Johnny Vegas: He should be put on a registry!!

Kelly Carmichael eventually and begrudgingly hands over the mic to the interloper. Johnny clears his throat and speaks.

Johnny Hitmaker: Let… me make... one thing… PERFECTLY CLEAR:

Any pops from wrestling enthusiasts are utterly drowned out by the insurmountable boos. Johnny is aware he’s in enemy territory, but that doesn’t stop him from whipping off his shades and mean-mugging everyone.

Johnny Hitmaker: You know something? You people got a REAL big problem… A real big problem with not being able to SHUT UP!!

The fans boo even louder than before.

Johnny Vegas: The fans DON’T know how to shut up, but they’re Carnage fans, so they don’t HAVE to!

Terra Skye: Other Johnny was already in a bad mood before coming out here tonight, but the fans have made sure to give him actual reason to be mad!

Johnny shakes his head in disgust.

Johnny Hitmaker: This is typical behaviour… Typical behaviour from, from the BUSH LEAGUES!!

The fans jeer the audacious claim.

Terra Skye: That’s just disrespectful.

Johnny Vegas: Not to mention, this so-called “bush league” absolutely WHIPPED a large group of The Coalition, so…

Johnny Hitmaker: So to patronize you people, my name is Johnny Hitmaker, agent to some of the very BEST in this business today! I’ve been wrestling for 20 years and finally retired back at the end of 2019, almost… ALMOST beating then-World Champion Sarah Lacklan for her belt!

Johnny Vegas: Why does he think wrestling gives out participation trophies nowadays?

Terra Skye: Other Johnny has many accolades attached to his name, but he suffers from a bad attitude.

Johnny Vegas: Yeah!

Terra Skye: Like you!

Johnny Vegas: Hey! I thought we were supposed to be on the same side!

Johnny Hitmaker: But nowadays, I’m the aforementioned manager to the stars… The #1 Hit-Maker, if you will! And among my clients is none other than one of the GREATEST UGWC World Heavyweight Champions of all time, “Deathwish” Hide Yamazaki!

The fans indeed pop The Strong Style Satanist. Johnny looks a bit annoyed at their reaction, but brushes it off.

Johnny Hitmaker: Who is not here tonight-

The fans immediately begin booing again, once more annoying Johnny.

Terra Skye: The fans do love Hide Yamazaki no matter where he wrestles!

Johnny Vegas: Everyone loves a big dumb animal!

Terra Skye: Don’t let neither him nor Johnny hear you say that!

Johnny Vegas: Oh shit, right, Hide’s a cannibal! Never mind!

Johnny Hitmaker: I came here at great expense to myself, but I left Hide in good hands, since he’s wrestling tonight on the GOOD Monday show, Synergy, LIVE FROM THE UGWC ARENA IN CHI-

But the boos drown out his cheap promotion material. Johnny just stands there, waiting for them to settle back down.

Johnny Vegas: Oh great, he’s seriously going to wait this out.

Terra Skye: Don’t worry, security’s on hold.

Johnny Vegas: Psh, “wrestling security”.

After a few more moments, the fans die back down.

Johnny Hitmaker: ANYWAY. I’m mostly just here tonight on Chaos to, to, to CONGRATULATE the FINE folks here in Carnage for a, a, a job well done at Incursion!

The fans seem wary, but nonetheless cheer what was indeed a job well done by their roster.

Johnny Vegas: I’m not convinced this lesser Johnny’s being sincere.

Johnny Hitmaker: Seven matches! Seven matches with only PRIDE on the line! Four out of those seven matches were won… by YOUR guys!

The fans pop even more!

Terra Skye: I don’t know, he seems… SOMEWHAT sincere? He’s just stating facts now though.

Johnny Hitmaker: And THAT effectively means that Carnage won the whole NIGHT! So let’s have a round of applause for the hard-working folks in the back!

The fans indeed cheer, and Johnny himself even claps.

Johnny Vegas: That weasel has a way to get people on his side.

Terra Skye: Well, everyone who participated at Incursion DOES deserve the praise at least!

But then, Johnny’s smile slowly fades, and his clapping slows down, slow enough that it’s apparent that his applause wasn’t authentic. As the fans catch on, Johnny is still letting out a clap every three seconds. Finally, he raises the mic again.

Johnny Hitmaker: It’s just too bad that this little cross-promotional dealie… should never have happened!!

Once more the fans boo. Vegas glares at Terra.

Terra Skye: What? I guess I’m just an eternal optimist.

Johnny Hitmaker: Need I REMIND you that back in November at Battleground, JC lost… LOST to my man Hide Yamazaki! He was the answer to The Answer that night!

The fans… well, they boo! Are you surprised?!

Johnny Hitmaker: And THEN, back in January, a bird-themed wrestler tried coming for us… and HE lost TOO!

More boos!

Johnny Vegas: What’s he even trying to say?

Terra Skye: I mean, he’s right, but does that negate what our side accomplished at Incursion?

Johnny Hitmaker: So, in conclusion, and as far as I’M concerned, WE brought the fight to Carnage LONG before Incursion was ever a thing… and WE beat you guys!

Even more boos!

Johnny Hitmaker: NOT you, not ANY of you in the back, US. JUST us, Hide and The Johnny! It didn’t require a whole-ass pay-per-view event to prove we were simply better than Carnage!

Yet even more boos!

Johnny Hitmaker: But egos flared, promises were made that shouldn’t have been, and too many variables wound up screwing up a good thing!

Boos! Boos! Boos!

Johnny Vegas: Didn’t his man LOSE to Casanova English?

Terra Skye: Somehow, I don’t think he thinks that counts.

The #1 Hit-Maker holds up a finger to try to quell the crowd.

Johnny Hitmaker: But, tell you people what: I’ll be fair, I’ll be benevolent, I’ll be downright KIND by proclaiming Incursion to be… A TIE!

Now THAT really pisses off the crowd, and they start throwing their trash in Johnny’s direction. Johnny looks sincerely offended at the justified reaction from the fans.

Johnny Vegas: That’s right, pelt him with that low-quality beer!

Terra Skye: While I don’t agree that they’re stooping to his level, at least it seems to be making him leave.

And Johnny is indeed starting to move away from the ringside area.

Johnny Hitmaker: This isn’t over! You hear me?! This! Isn’t! OVER! I’ll be back, mark my words!

And with that, Johnny drops his mic so he can rush off to the backstage area and away from the barrage of junk.

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Johnny Vegas: ...The guy knows we're pretty much done after Underground, doesn't he?

Terra Skye: I mean, maybe? But those were some bold claims for someone who's threatening a promotion that's not going to be open for much longer.

Johnny Vegas: Speaking of, where the fuck is Ray?

Terra Skye: Ray isn't here tonight. Let's just move on, shall we?

Johnny Vegas: What about Boy? Why the fuck are you sitting over there not being annoying?!

Boy: Frosties.

Johnny Vegas: Well then. Also, oh god.. Look at these two fucks... Why does Carnage have to be this way?

The 'two fucks' being referenced stand across from one another in the ring, Android 69 standing stoically while his... manager? stands at ringside, yelling out instructions. Garbage Fence on the other hand has stopped collecting whatever strewn about garbage he can find at ringside that had been thrown at UGWC's Johnny Hitmaker and he's now staring directly at the android, his eyes glassy and his mouth repeating the word 'collections'.



The bell rings and neither opponent moves right away, until Android 69's Manager hits the apron a few times, looking back down at the dial in his hand, turning it and suddenly Android 69 makes a move towards a surprised Garbage Fence! Fence goes down to the mat, having been hit by an Robot Clothesline. Fence shakes his head and grabs at the leg of Android 69, now screaming 'COLLECTIONS' as he tries to pry the leg off of his opponent's body!

Johnny Vegas: What the fuck is even going on right now?!

Android 69 somehow pulls his leg away from Garbage Fence, turning around into a hard right hand from Garbage Fence but the Android only stumbles back a step before laying Garbage Fence out with a robot punch of his own! Fence scrambles away as Android 69 pursues. Fence pulls himself up in the corner and turns around, screaming 'GARBAGE' in the face of his opponent, only to be clubbed over the head by one robot clubbing forearm, and another! And another! Fence is now down in the corner, shaking the cobwebs out of his already cobweb riddled head as Android 69 backs away and into the far corner.

Terra Skye: Now what is Android 69 going to do?!

Johnny Vegas: Did you just hear what you just said?!

Terra Skye: Don't remind me.

LAUNCH TIME!!! Android 69 hits Garbage Fence in the corner with a robotic bronco buster! Fence screams out in agony as the robot hits him in the face over and over with his metal nether regions! Android 69 gets up, bringing Fence back up to his feet and completes his dominating performance with the BIG SPOON!!! Fence taps right away, crying 'Collections' as he does!!



Kelly Carmichael: Your winner... ANDROID 69!!!!

Johnny Vegas: I literally have no comment for what I just saw.

Terra Skye: You know what? Me either.

Boy: Extra Terrestrials.

Terra Skye: Yeah, that. Congratulations to Android 69 and his... manager for a dominating performance out here tonight. Let's get ready for the next match! Be back in a few!

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Terra Skye: And now we have another debut tonight, of one Emily Gabbard - Sister of the late Ricky Gabbard.

Johnny Vegas: Who... and Who?

Terra Skye: Ugh. It would be nice if you'd do the research for once in your life and actually KNOW something about the people who fight for Carnage.

Johnny Vegas: And for once I can say this and it actually makes sense... WHAT'S THE POINT?!

As Terra and Johnny continue arguing, Johnny Love and his opponent - The beautiful and seemingly aggravated Emily Gabbard enter the ring. She stands in the corner with her arms crossed over her chest while Johnny Love tunes up his air guitar.



Once again, neither competitor moves right away. Johnny Love motions towards Gabbard, trying to impress her with his guitar playing as he riffs on nothing but air. Gabbard moves out of the corner, approaching him as if she were extremely interested in what he's doing, only to take the air out of his sails with a hard slap to the face! Love stumbles backwards into the corner but to his credit, he emerges again quickly, having dropped his air guitar and is now looking to fight. Gabbard quickly ducks behind the referee before Love can get to her.

Johnny Vegas: Well, that's certainly a strategy.

Terra Skye: It's pretty obvious Emily doesn't want to be here, and she's unsure of what Johnny Love is capable of so--

Johnny Vegas: Nothing. He's capable of literally nothing.

Terra Skye: IF you would have let me finish... But yeah. You're pretty much spot on with that assessment.

After a few moments of cat and mousing with Johnny Love, the referee finally gets out of Gabbards grasp and now Johnny Love has his opening. He moves to grab Gabbard, but to her credit, she's much to fast for him and she sidesteps him, and when Love turns his attention in the direction she darted, she pokes him in the eye! Love shrieks in agony as he drops to a knee while the referee admonishes Gabbard who shakes her head and blows him off. She takes advantage of the opportunity while Love is down on his knees near the ropes to shove him neck first onto them and begins choking Johnny Love! The referee immediately begins counting to five, but Emily only lets up just before the referee says 'five'. She lets go of Love and ignores the referees warnings as she backs away from a coughing Johnny Love, shaking her head.

Terra Skye: Wow.

Johnny Vegas: I like her!

Terra Skye: Of course you do. Christ...

Love pulls himself back up to his feet and turns around to see Gabbard standing behind him. He surprises her with a clothesline, which sends her down to the mat, but when he goes for another one, Gabbard wisely hides behind the referee once more, causing Love to stop prematurely, as to not hit the referee. Love pulls the referee away from Gabbard and rushes in for another clothesline, but Gabbard somehow ducks out of the way and (kinda?) hits a dropkick on Johnny Love, sending him backwards into the far corner but Gabbard obviously didn't get all of it and Love comes back out of the corner determined to get his hands on his opponent but Gabbard trips him up almost instantly and grabs him up into a small package pin!!!


One!!


Two!!


THREE!!!



Kelly Carmichael: Your winner.. EMILY GABBARD!!!

Terra Skye: Well, thank God for Emily's speed because if Love would have gotten his hands on her, this might have been a different match.

Johnny Vegas: Do you REALLY think that? Come on.

Boy: Yesterdays garbage, todays problems.

Terra Skye: For all the hiding and cheating she was doing, I think Love might have had a chance. She didn't look comfortable in there, and she most definitely didn't look like she even wanted to be doing this. But that's just my opinion.

Johnny Vegas: Your opinion sucks. Let's just go to break so you can think about that.

Terra Skye: Fine. We'll be back in a few folks.

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Cut backstage, where Catalina Cortes has cordoned off a section of the hallway for the sake of research. She stands ring ready, hair and makeup done, a sequined robe over her black and orange gear, the Carnage World Heavyweight Championship strapped across her chest. Her hands clutch an iPad, fingers scrolling and scrolling through last minute research.

Catalina Cortes: How many types of Kryptonite are there? Whoa, the Platinum sounds pretty good, but there’s no way I can get it on short notice.

The camera pulls back to reveal a whiteboard and the results of her research in black sharpie. The champ’s fingers keep scrolling.




Catalina Cortes: Green Lantern used to be weak against wood and the color yellow? Wonder if he ever fought a yellow log.


Suddenly The Avenger whooshes into frame and lands right behind Cortes.

The Avenger: Whatcha doin’?

Catalina notices the wind on her secret robe and looks up from her research, stopping on a Zatanna Wikipedia entry.

Catalina Cortes: Sup, dude? Lemme try something. Eht Regneva, esol ot em! Anything?

The Avenger stares slack-jawed for a moment, and for that moment, Cortes begins to wonder if something happened. Instead he shakes his head to clear the brain fog away before smiling.

The Avenger: Nope! I don’t speak Spanish!

Her scrolling done and research finalized, Cat abandons the iPad and addresses the masked hero before her.

Catalina Cortes: Guess I’ll stick with the first three. Maaaaaaybe the fourth.

Avenger scratches his head, not sure what she means as it would be very unheroic to spy on what’s someone else’s screen. He glances upward.

The Avenger: Can I just hear every narrator now? That’s really annoying.

He rolls his eyes and glances back at his opponent for tonight.

The Avenger: Anyway, I came to wish you good luck tonight!

Cat blinks at the show of sportsmanship.

Catalina Cortes: Oh yeah, you too. Afterwards, I need to pick your brain about fighting supervillains. Don’t know if you heard, but I have one now. It’s pretty cool, even though I want to murder her.

Avenger tilts his head.

The Avenger: Okay well the first rule is, don’t murder. Murder is bad.

Catalina Cortes: Deadpool murders and he’s a box office phenomenon.

Avenger thinks for a moment then laughs, nervously.

The Avenger: Citizen Cortes, Deadpool is a fictional character. We’re real!

He glances at the camera and stares at the audience for a moment before coughing and turning back to his opponent.

The Avenger: And real, good people, do not murder.

Catalina Cortes: Okay, but I’m still gonna try to murder her in the in-the-ring sense. How the hell do you not get irrational, boiling rage when you deal with this shit?

The Avenger: Okay, first of all...language! Second of all, it’s easy! This is just one small place in the entire multiverse! I stopped worlds from being erased. Some jerk being a jerk is easy to deal with.

Catalina Cortes: I appreciate your optimism and the fact that you’ve taken mushrooms.

Avenger shakes his head, completely unaware of the context.

The Avenger: No, I don’t eat before a match. Makes me queasy.

Catalina Cortes: Oh cool, one of those we’re-not-so-different moments. I always binge after. But anyway, multiverse, no cursing, easy jerk. I’ll try to keep all that straight, but I’ll probably default to Blaze Kicking.

Avenger crosses his arms.

The Avenger: And no murdering.

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Johnny Vegas: In what FUCKED up world does Avenger even think he has a CHANCE against our world champion?

Terra Skye: Apparently this one since you know, he does. He is the Baltimore City Champ, you know.

Johnny Vegas: A lot of good that'll do him when he loses to THE CHAMP.

Boy: Crispy grapes with sausage.

Johnny Vegas: See? Even Boy agrees.

Terra Skye: If it's coming out of your mouth, I'm almost certain Boy doesn't agree. But anyway, we're getting ready to start our next match here this evening - Lord Raab against Zack Tyler.



As soon as the bell rings, Raab is off to the races as he hits a shoulder tackle into Zack Tyler, sending the smaller man flying backwards into the ropes! He bounces off and is taken down to the mat in short time with a hard lariat from Lord Raab!! Raab wastes no time, grabbing Tyler and bringing him back up into a spinebuster! Tyler rolls away, grabbing the ropes as Lord Raab climbs back to his feet, stalking Tyler as he pulls himself up onto the ropes in the corner!

Terra Skye: Lord Raab isn't out here to fuck around tonight.

Johnny Vegas: When is Raab ever out here to fuck around? Have you even Raab'd?

Terra Skye: Ugh... I hate you.

Tyler pulls himself up and turns around to see Raab bearing down on him with clubbing fists that he ducks, letting Raab hit nothing but ropes! Tyler moves in behind Raab, laying down a few well placed kicks to the calfs of Raab, but it only serves to aggravate the big man as he turns around and headbutts Tyler in the forehead, sending him back down to a knee! Raab growls as he grabs Tyler around the throat and lifts him up, slamming him hard into the mat with the Chokeinator!!! Raab kneels above Tyler, his hand on his chest for a pin!


One!!


Two!!


Three!!



Kelly Carmichael: Your winner... LORD RAAB!!!!

Terra Skye: Another dominate performance here tonight, this time Lord Raab showed Zack Tyler who's the monster here.

Johnny Vegas: I think you drank a cup of stupid tonight, Terra-ble.

Boy: BROKEN FISH!

Terra Skye: Considering you've been drinking stupid for years.. I wouldn't be talking, Johnny.

Johnny Vegas: Fuck you! Good job Raab! I hope your murder boner has been satiated for tonight.

Terra Skye: Okay... Well on that note, we're going to take a small break.

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Terra Skye: Moving on, we're about to see the number one contenders for the tag team titles going up against Zephyr Quinn and Trent Steel.

Johnny Vegas: Ugh.. FAST FORWARD!

Terra Skye: Well that's not going to work and as much as you hate it, you're going to have to watch it anyway!

Boy: VEHICLES ARE LONG!

Both teams are already inside the ring, with Kyra Johnson and Zephyr Quinn getting ready to start this one off as Trent Steel and Ken Davison both step out onto the apron. Both women look ready to go as the referee calls for the opening bell!



Kyra and Zephyr circle one another for a few moments, locking up in the center of the ring. The two jockey for position, with Quinn getting the advantage, irish whipping Kyra towards the ropes. On the rebound, Zephyr goes for a short arm clothesline that Kyra ducks. On the rebound off the ropes, it's Kyra's turn to go for a clothesline, but Zephyr ducks the attempt! Rebounding off the ropes once more, Kyra approaches and attempts a running superkick which Zephyr counters into a belly to back suplex, taking Kyra down to the mat! Both women are quick back to their feet, however and Kyra clocks Quinn with a hard right to the jaw! Quinn returns the favor and the two women begin trading rights and lefts until Kyra gets the upperhand, pushing Zephyr into a neutral corner, continuing the onslaught! The referee begins the count and Kyra backs away, giving Zephyr the opening to rush out of the corner, catching Kyra flush in the face with a surprise headbutt!

Terra Skye: Zephyr Quinn and Kyra are showing off their toughness and their speed right off the bat in this contest.

Johnny Vegas: Yeah, yeah... sure.

Kyra stumbles backwards and Quinn moves in behind her, rolling her up for the first pin attempt of the match!


One!!

Kyra kicks out just after the one count! Quinn pulls Kyra back to a vertical base, hitting her with a few quick punches before she irish whips her off the ropes once more, this time when Kyra returns she hits the former UV champ with a quick DDT, spiking Kyra's head into the mat! With a head of steam, Quinn decides to try to end this one early as she backs away while Kyra gets back to her knees. It's obvious that Quinn is looking for 'the craziest thing', but when Kyra gets back to her feet - Kyra counters the STO into the 'Baltimore Backbreaker'!! Zephyr is down and Kyra is crawling towards her corner and the outstretched hand of Ken Davison!

Terra Skye: Kyra needs to get Ken into the match, and I'd venture to say Zephyr needs to get her partner into it as well! These women have put on quite a match thus far though.

Zephyr moves towards her corner as well and both women tag in their respective partners at the same time! Ken Davison and Trent Steel step into the match and it goes pretty much exactly the way everyone and their brother expected it to go - Ken lunges for Trent, going for the Brodieline right off the bat but Trent drops down and brings Ken down to the mat with a drop toe hold! Ken immediately rolls away and Trent follows suit as the two men get back up and begin laying in haymakers to one another! But once more, Trent ducks one of Ken's strikes and goes for a neckbreaker but this time Ken sees it coming and sends Trent flying into the turnbuckle with a exploder suplex! Ken pulls Trent away from the ropes and goes for the cover!


One!!


T--NO! Trent kicks out just before two and headbutts Ken for good measure, causing Ken to fall backwards onto the mat. Trent gets back to his feet and hits Ken with a flying knee to the face, sending Ken into the opposing corner where Trent reaches out and tags Zephyr back into the match! Zephyr gets in and she and Trent whip Ken into the ropes and upon his return, Zephyr hits Ken flush with the 'Termination of hostilities' as Trent climbs back out onto the apron. Quinn grabs Ken and brings him back to his fee--NO! Ken grabs Zephyr with the Iron Claw as he gets back to a vertical base! He lays in a few knee lifts to the abdomen of Quinn but Quinn drops down and Ken loses the hold! Ken whips back around as Zephyr gets up and this time he HITS the Brodieline, sending Quinn down to the mat in a heap! Ken goes down for a pin attempt on Quinn!


One!!


Two!!

NO!! Quinn kicks out at two! Ken shakes his head and rolls away, getting back to his feet quickly - and before Zephyr can get up, Ken sends a double foot stomp to the ankle of Quinn! Quinn grabs at her ankle while Ken attempts a second, but Quinn catches him with a pop up punch that staggers Ken momentarily! That gives Quinn enough time to tag Steel back in! Steel gets into the ring and grabs Ken, looking for the Pittsburgh Nightmare but NO! Ken somehow slips out of his grasp and lunges for the corner - Tagging Kyra back into the match!

Terra Skye: Oh shit, here we go.

Johnny Vegas: Does it even look like I remotely care?

Terra Skye: No, but you should. This has been a great back and forth contest thus far.

Johnny Vegas: YAWN.

Kyra hops over the top rope and rushes at Steel, taking him down with a Lou Thesz Press! She begins raining down punches until Trent's had enough and pushes her off of him! But she's right back up to her feet as is Trent and the two pick up right where they left off in the last match they had together! Trent eventually gets the upperhand and tosses Kyra into the neutral turnbuckle, and while she's there Trent hits her with a superkick that sends her down to a seated position! Trent grabs her by the head and picks her up, looking for the eradication into the very same turnbuckle - and he hits it! Kyra crumples to the mat and Trent drags her out from the corner. Cover!


One!!


Two!!


Th--NO! Ken Davison breaks up the pin, kicking Trent in the skull! Ken dives on top of Trent, wailing on him as Kyra rolls away and gets her bearings about her. In the meanwhile, Zephyr sees what's going on and decides to use the opportunity to climb up to the top turnbuckle. She turns around, seeing Ken still engaged with Trent in the middle of the ring, with Kyra just getting to her feet just in front of them. A smirk comes over Quinn's face as she makes the leap off of the top turnbuckle just as Kyra turns to see her - Zephyr takes everyone down with a diving crossbody! Trent and Zephyr are the first back to their feet as Quinn grabs Ken and rolls him out of the ring before she steps back out as well.

Terra Skye: I know I say it a lot, but these two teams are evenly matched. More evenly matched than I've seen in a while, honestly.

Johnny Vegas: You say it so much that it loses all its meaning, you know.

Terra Skye: Oh fuck you. At least I'm trying to find shit to say.

Boy: MOUTHY MOTHRA!

That leaves Trent looking down at Kyra as she slowly gets back to her feet, shaking the cobwebs out of her head. Trent pulls her up to her feet and delivers a headbutt to her forehead that sends her stumbling back into the ropes. Steel charges but Kyra drops and pulls down the top rope leaving Trent to spill out onto the apron. Steel manages to hold on though and not fall all the way to the floor. Kyra runs and springboards off of the middle rope looking for a dropkick but Trent catches her by the throat mid-jump and looks for a chokeslam from the ring apron to the floor! Kyra desperately reaches for the ropes with one arm and back-elbows Steel in the temple with the other. She lands on her feet on the apron beside Steel but Trent quickly grabs her and gives her a side-russian leg sweep off of the apron and down to the thin mats below! On the other side of the ring, Zephyr has Davison backed up to one of the ringside barricades and is chopping away at his chest. Zephyr yells out to the crowd as she takes a few steps back and follows up with a clothesline that sends both of them spilling over the steel railing and out into the first row of the audience. Quinn tries to follow up, but Kenly catches her with a surprise heart punch that has her stumbling backward. Davison looks up to see Kyra in trouble and he pushes his way through the row to get over to her, but right as he is about to get his hands on steel, Zephyr comes flying back in from behind! The referee is trying to get the action back inside the ring, but the more these four exchange punches and kicks and chops, they fight their way further and further toward the backstage area. Finally the referee has no choice but to call the match off, as security is needed to break them up before any members of the audience get caught in the crossfire.



Johnny Vegas: What in the hell are you ringing the damn bell for, Boy?

Boy: The scarecrow walks at midnight!

Kelly Carmichael: Ladies and Gentlemen, I've been informed by our referee that the match is being ruled a no-contest!

Johnny Vegas: Oh, that's fucking lame.

Terra Skye: Well, I don't know what else you want them to do, Johnny. It's kind of hard to have a tag match when none of the four of them want to fight this in the ring. Plus, we didn't advertise it as falls-count-anywhere or UltraViolent, we could get sued if somebody gets hurt!

Johnny Vegas: Oh, screw that. Sue the fucking place, who cares? We're closing soon anyway, woohoo!

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Terra Skye: Moving on to the next match, we get to see our Baltimore City champ go up against our World Champ, in a non title match of course.

Johnny Vegas: Well no fucking shit.

Boy: GROVER CLEVELAND!

Johnny Vegas: Just shut up so I can watch Avenger get his quasi-heroic ass kicked!

Terra Skye: Avenger's been on quite a tear lately, I wouldn't be so sure that Catalina has this one in the bag, but of course, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention the fact that since Catalina signed with Carnage, she's had very, very few losses. It's quite incredible.

Johnny Vegas: Of COURSE it is!



Both competitors start off with a simple lock up, before Avenger twists around with an armbar which Catalina counters with some flippy shit, and reverses it. Avenger, not to be outdone - does some flippy shit of his own and reverses Catalina's armbar! Another few moments of this follows, and the crowd is completely behind both competitors as they both eventually take off for the opposite ropes, clotheslining one another on the rebound! Both of them are only down on the mat for a very short time, Avenger narrowly beating Catalina back to his feet. He takes the extra second he has and grabs Cats arm, leading her towards the ropes. Springboard Hurricanrana to the world champ!

Terra Skye: Well I'll be damned.

Catalina being as smart as she is, immediately rolls away and under the ropes while Avenger stands tall in the ring, his hands on his hips. Cat takes a short walk around the side of the ring, rolling back in a few seconds later. Cat claps her hands and nods her head as the two once again square off. What happens next is almost a play by play repeat of what happened to begin the match, but this time, at the end of it it's Catalina with the advantage, taking Avenger down with a springboard Cata-Rana!!! Avengers gets up to his knees, nodding his head at his opponent as Cat gets back to her feet, a satisfied smile on her face.

Johnny Vegas: KICK HIS ASS!!!

Terra Skye: I think that's what she's trying to do.

Johnny Vegas: DO IT HARDER!!!

Boy: LEAVING FOR MISSISSIPPI AT DAWN!!

But instead of getting up to his feet, Avenger surprises Cat with a russian leg sweep, sending the CW world champ scrambling back to her feet and when she gets there, Avenger is already there to meet her with a release suplex! While Cat gets back to a vertical base, Avenger ascends the turnbuckles and when he turns around he leaps - Hitting Catalina with the Caped Crusade!!! Cover!!


One!!


Two!!

NO! Catalina kicks out at the count of two! Undeterred by this, Avenger gets up and is met with a formidable combination of taekwondo kicks from the world champion! Once the Avenger is stunned, Catalina finishes off the flurry of moves with a picture perfect Blaze kick, sending Avenger down on his back! Cover from the world champ!


One!!


Two!!!


T--NO! Avenger kicks out! Catalina doesn't waste anytime, bringing Avenger back up to his feet, looking for the Cata-Clysm to finish this match but Avenger has the wherewithal to slip out of her grasp, hitting her with a superhero kick out of nowhere! Catalina is down! Avenger drops down for another cover!


One!!


T--NOO!! Catalina kicks out again!

Johnny Vegas: OH COME ON!

Boy: GOOSE NECKS!

Terra Skye: There's a reason these two are champions here, and this is why. What a great match.

Both competitors are up and Avenger immediately goes for another Superhero kick, but NO! Catalina ducks it! Tornado DDT from the World Champ! Catalina isn't done though, she brings Avenger back up to his feet and this time she hits all of the Cata-Clysm! Cover!!


One!!


Two!!


Three!!!



Kelly Carmichael: Your winner... CATALINA CORTES!!!!

Terra Skye: Catalina pulled out the win here tonight against a very game Aven--Wait..

Johnny Vegas: What the shit?!

The music cuts out and at the entrance, Garbage Fence and Johnny Love step out, followed by Hans and the rest of the Debators. Catalina looks up the ramp.

Terra Skye: This can't be good...

With The Avenger still down, Catalina prepares themselves as the six Debators begin to make their way to the ring. From behind Catalina, however, Ragdoll appears through the crowd sliding into the ring.

Johnny Vegas: Ah fuck! Turn around Cortes!

Too late. Catalina turns as Jaclyn catches her head and drives their chin straight into her shoulder.

Terra Skye: Punchline!

The Avenger begins to pull themselves up only to be caught by Ragdoll, Avenger's arms pulled back being them. Ragdoll smiles up at the audience as she places her foot on the back of Avenger's head before sadistically stomping down on their head.

Terra Skye: Killing Joke!

As Catalina and the Avenger lay prone in the ring, Ragdoll ducks out and makes her way back up the ramp. The Debators stand staring at the ring for a moment as Ragdoll cheerily walks up to them.

Johnny Vegas: THAT BITCH!

Terra Skye: Jesus Christ...

Ragdoll signals and the group follows her into the back area.

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Terra Skye: Ragdoll is really trying to make life difficult for our world champ since Incursion.

Johnny Vegas: Which is completely NOT okay!

Terra Skye: Well if we know anything about Catalina, she's not just going to let this slide.

Boy: Under carriage wash!

Johnny Vegas: As she shouldn't! That creepy little... THING will PAY!

Terra Skye: I suppose we'll find out, but for now we've got our next match ready to begin. Lab Rat King and Silvio Leon are going up against Incubus and Succubus and both teams look ready to go!

Silvio Leon and Succubus stand inside the ring as their teammates step outside and the referee calls for the bell!



In an instant, Leon is in Succubus' face! She doesn't have time to react as Leon hits her with an elbow to the temple, followed by a spinning heel kick, doubling her over! Leon wastes no time, rushing for the ropes - and on the rebound, he brings Succubus all the way down to the mat with a beautiful dropkick! Succubus falls backwards, hitting the mat as Incubus steps into the ring and approaches Leon, but before he can, Kane King is in the ring and has grabbed Incubus by the head, tossing him out of the ring where he unceremoniously lands on the floor. King follows Incubus outside, while Leon turns his attention back to Succubus, who's pulling herself up with assistance from the ropes.

Johnny Vegas: What is it tonight? Did people just not show up or something?

Terra Skye: Everyone is entitled to an off night every now and again.

Johnny Vegas: Well apparently all these fucks are taking their off night on the same fucking night!

Terra Skye: Leon is looking impressive here in the early going though.

Leon makes a move but Succubus stops him in his tracks with a headbutt, staggering Leon just enough for her to stun him even further with an hurricanrana, sending the Oracle careening towards his own corner where King is just climbing back onto the apron. Leon tags King in and the Lab Rat King is officially the legal man in this match! King makes a mad dash for Succubus, but she has just enough time to somehow get a tag in to her partner! Incubus is in the ring now, and the two men begin trading blows, lefts and rights, much like they were doing out on the ringside floor. King gets the advantage, pushing Incubus into a neutral corner. King grabs Incubus and tosses him back into the center of the ring with an overhead belly to belly suplex that echoes throughout the arena!

Terra Skye: Holy shit, they're owning Pandemonium here this evening.

Boy: Seventy wishes for mother!

Johnny Vegas: I thought Pandemonium were better than this.

Incubus arches his back in pain as King rises back up and pulls Incubus back to his feet, dragging him over to their corner, tagging Silvio Leon back into the match. Silvio takes over, whipping Incubus into the ropes, and taking him down with a Miskatonic Twist! Leon gets back to his feet and tags King back in. King brings Incubus up, and slams him into the mat hard with a chokeslam! But before King can go for the cover, Succubus is back in the ring, clocking King in the side of the head with a well placed kick! King shakes his head, but he doesn't go down. So Succubus goes at it again, while Silvio climbs back into the ring and all four of them begin going at it!

Terra Skye: We knew this was going to happen eventually.

Johnny Vegas: I only care if heads start coming off!

Boy: GRAVY TRAIN!

Incubus and Silvio fight into the corner, with Incubus headbutting Incubus, and Silvio coming back in with a hard right of his own while King and Succubus duke it out in the middle of the ring until King grabs her up into the Tranquilizer!!! But she's not the legal person in the match! Meanwhile, Incubus kicks Leon in the gut and tosses him from the ring - turning his attention to King who doesn't notice Incubus running in with a dropkick straight to the face, causing King to release his hold on Succubus! Succubus rolls out of the ring and lands on the ground as Silvio ends up on the floor beside the ring steps.

Terra Skye: Oh lord...

Johnny Vegas: The big guy isn't going to be happy about this...

Inside the ring, Incubus begins laying in the kicks to the back and head of King, but King screams out and gets up, grabbing Incubus and hitting him with a thunderous Empty, Hollow, Thud! Pin!


One!!


Two!!


Three!!



Kelly Carmichael: Your winners... TEAM HELLBENT!!!!

Terra Skye: I gotta say, Silvio and King make a great team.

Johnny Vegas: I can't disagree, and even if I could... I don't know if I would because that big fuck scares me.

Terra Skye: He's our Ultraviolent Champ for a reason. Anyway, we're headed into another short break and we'll be back in a few for tonight's main event!

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Terra Skye: Well it's certainly been an eventful night.

Johnny Vegas: Yeah, yeah, I'm ready to get out of this bitch and go home.

Terra Skye: You're always ready to leave. So what's new?

Johnny Vegas: Because after a few more shows, I won't have to come back! HAH! And you'll never have to see my fat ass again!

Boy: GROSS NICKELS!

Terra Skye: Believe it or not, that actually doesn't make me happy, Johnny. But anyway, looks like we're ready to get this Chaos championship match underway.



With Ransom looking on from the outside, Casanova turns his attention to the challenger who's simply standing on the far side of the ring, her head cocked as she stares at him. English shakes his head and motions for her to approach, but she simply stays where she is, a devilish smirk on her painted lips. Casanova continues shaking his head, pacing around the ring until he finally decides to make a move on the challenger - But Ragdoll is ready for him as she uses her powerful legs and sends Casanova flying backwards with a shotgun dropkick right out of the corner! Ragdoll is on top of Casanova in an instant, laying fists into the face of the Chaos Champ until he finally is able to push her off of him and scrambles back to his feet, wiping a bit of blood from his lip.

Terra Skye: I'd say that Ragdoll needs to look out for Ransom standing at ringside, but something tells me she has this handled.

Johnny Vegas: Bitch is crazy. Of course she does.

Ragdoll rushes in almost immediately, looking for a spinning back elbow but Casanova reverses it into his own flying forearm, startling Ragdoll for a moment! Casanova tries to build on the little bit of momentum he got from that forearm, looking to grab Ragdoll into a swinging neckbreaker, but Ragdoll is too quick with a flying knee to the face of Casanova English! English stumbles backwards into the turnbuckle as Ragdoll moves in behind him. Casanova turns around and sends a hard right into the temple of Ragdoll, laying her out right in front of him. Lying on her back, Casanova moves in to grab her, but out of no where she rises to a seated position, looking like a puppet - The Ragdoll Rise! Casanova, frustrated, sends his boot into her face and drops down to cover the challenger!


One!!

NO! Ragdoll kicks out at one!

Terra Skye: I'm afraid Casanova English has his work cut out for him tonight.

Casanova gets back up, but Ragdoll catches him before he can, honking his nose and kicking her leg up, right into the groin of Casanova English! English grabs his nether regions and falls to the mat in agony! Ragdoll climbs back to her feet and looks around at the droves of booing fans before she approaches him from behind...

THE KILLING JOKE! She jams his face into the canvas! The Champ is down! Cover!


One!!


Two!!!


NOOO! Casanova English somehow kicks out just before the three count. Ragdoll slips off of him and backs away, waiting for him to rise to his feet and after a few moments... he does just that. But when he turns around... PUNCHLINE!! She got all of it! COVER!


One!!


Two!!


THREE!!



Kelly Carmichael: Your winner and NEW Chaos Champion... RAGDOLL!!!

Terra Skye: We have a new Chaos Champion! We--

POP/STARS vs MEGALOVANIA by Dj Cutman kicks in, as the screen shifts to say CATALINA CORTES, complete with an anime cat(resembling a public domain version of Litten to avoid any legal complications) in place of the O.

Catalina Cortes bursts through the curtain in a full sprint towards the startled clown.

Johnny Vegas: Sweet, sweet Catalina is back for her pound of flesh! TAKE OUT THAT CREEPY BITCH!

Catalina slides in and ducks a lazy right from the already winded Ragdoll. A swift kick to the thigh stumbles Ragdoll forward into Catalina who pulls her arm and neck down into the cusp of her elbow.

Terra Skye: Cata-Clysm!

Johnny Vegas: And That's why she's the champ.

Catalina has mounted Ragdoll and is now dropping elbows across her face, not noticing Garbage Fence leading the charge of the Masked Debators.

Terra Skye: It boggles my mind why the Debaters have rallied themselves behind Ragdoll... But now that they're out here, Catalina might need to watch out.

Garbage Fence is first in to lead the charge, only to be met with a running powerkick as he tries to duck under the rope. Cat pulls herself upright and clips Violent Mist as well.

Terra Skye: Double Massacre at Melrose!! Holy shit!

Johnny Love is next in and fairs slightly better, getting fully upright before Catalina is able to connect with a beautiful spinning back heel kick.

Jason Lmoa suddenly grabs Catalina from behind and it looks like the champ is in trouble, no she's loose.

Terra Skye: Another Cata-Clysm!

Johnny Vegas: Oh shit.. LOOK OUT!

Catalina turns just in time for Ragdoll to catch her around the neck before dropping to the canvas.

Terra Skye: Another Punchline!

The rest of the Masked Debators help their fallen friends up as they enter the ring. At the direction of Ragdoll, they remove the bottom turnbuckle and surround the slowly recovering champion. They begin to drag the now struggling Catalina to the turnbuckle, forcing her face down into the turnbuckle.

Terra Skye: Oh no...

Ragdoll takes the hands, placing the back of her foot onto Cortez head, driving her face first into the turnbuckle.

Johnny Vegas: YOU LEAVE HER ALONE YOU BIG MEAN BITCH!

The champ goes limp and the Debators look to Jackie for direction. She continues to conduct the Chaos calling for them to continue.

Terra Skye: I think Cat is out of it...

Johnny Vegas: FUCK... FUCK!

The group begins to pull the body up again and suddenly the lights drop and a pair of lights ballyhoo over the ring.

Johnny Vegas: Oh god, what now...

The lights finally focus on the group and turn into the green Avenger signal.

Terra Skye: The Avenger!

Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out For A Hero" begins to play, another pair of spotlights search the rafters, finally landing on the Avenger who is crouching down, surveying the scene below. He stands up, his hand reaching for the handles of a zip line.

Right as Bonnie says, "I need a hero!", he leaps off into the air and begins to pick up speed as he descends towards the group who stand dumbfounded.

Boy: JUSTICE!

Garbage and Johnny Love take the main force of his kick, being thrown over the ropes completely. As the Avenger goes to remove the line, Jason Lmoa grabs him from behind only to catch a back elbow followed by a Superhero Kick. The Avenger ducks Violent Mist's Furious Mist which instead collides with Macho Libre, leveling him.

The Avenger clips Violet with a Superhero Kick to reward him and finally loosens the harness and turns to face the remaining two. Ragdoll licks her lips and motions for Hans to go who motions for Ragdoll to as the honorable Avenger anxiously awaits. Agreeing to go together, they move in only for Ragdoll to turn and make her way out of towards the rope.

Hans Ondikovitch swings at Avenger, who ducks and grabs him by the throat, but the the massive Hans shoves him backwards.

Terra Skye: Avenger was going for a chokeslam but Hans got out of it!

Avenger, who cannot be stopped by mere thugs, returns fire, right, left, right left, uppercut!

Terra Skye: Superhero Kick! Get out of that one!

Hans shoots out of the ring and Avenger turns to Ragdoll who is standing on the apron. She smiles and shrugs her shoulders, pointing to the fallen Catalina before bouncing to the floor to escape through the crowd.

The Avenger turns towards the fallen champion as officials and medical staff make their way out. The air is tense as the Avenger steps back to survey the scene and medical staff checks out Catalina.

Terra Skye: Jesus Christ, what a way to end Chaos 109... We hope Catalina Cortes is okay...

Johnny Vegas: Damn right we do... Fucks sake. And now this bitch is Chaos Champ? God help us now.

Boy: LICKING!

Terra Skye: Well, I'm afraid we're out of time here tonight but we'll see you in two weeks at Chaos 110.. The final edition of Monday night Chaos!!! Stay safe out there!

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